01.25.09
Posted in family, friends, kids, leadership
at 5:59 pm
I’m an introvert.
There was a time in my life when I thought that was a character flaw. Introverts don’t like people, right? They’re kind of anti-social and maybe even a little snotty. How can that possibly be a good thing? I once had a friend question whether or not an introvert could even be a missionary.
Then I learned the real definition of introvert. We’re not anti-social and snotty. We like people just as much as extroverts. But the difference is that being around people is draining for introverts. It makes us tired. Extroverts come home from a party excitedly talking about all the great conversations they had. Introverts would rather drive home in silence, ready to slip into bed. One time after church my wife was asking me all kinds of questions about things that had happened, and I finally had to sheepishly admit that I was out of words – I honestly didn’t have it in me to have any more conversation!
This week has been full of meetings. And the kids have needed a little more attention than usual. And being the interim team leader means people turn their head and look at me during a meeting when it’s decision time. Which all adds up to a very tired introvert. When I saw being an introvert as a bad thing, it also would have added up to a lot of guilt. “Maybe introverts really shouldn’t be missionaries?” I would think. Now I see it as a part of me being me. I need to take some time to get recharged before I drain all the way to zero. Staying at zero too long often leads to bad things.
It’s a good thing to start to feel comfortable with the personality that God gave me.
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01.11.09
Posted in culture, family, health care, kids
at 9:55 am
Everything is cultural. Every now and then I start to think that surely there must be some universal truths that are true for everyone in every culture. Like raising an infant. There have to be some dos and don’ts, right?
Wrong! Our kids’ pediatrician is teaching us that. Around Francesca’s five month check up, she hands Heidi a badly photocopied recipe called: Diet from the 6th Month. Here it is:
Make a vegetable puree with:
one potato, one carrot, one zucchini, one onion, and either some Swiss chard or celery.
Take 2-3 tablespoonfuls of the vegetable puree and add:
2 teaspoonfuls of extra virgin olive oil
2 teaspoonfuls of aged Parmesan cheese
3-4 tablespoonfuls of multi grain cereal or baby pasta
10 grams of powdered meat or 60 grams of pureed meat
And so once a day for lunch, that’s what Francesca eats. For dinner, we substitute ricotta cheese instead of the meat. Starting with the seventh month we add fish instead of meat. And from seven and a half months we add ham. And then month eight brings beans (surely we’ll notice the effects of that!).
We raised three kids in America, and I don’t ever remember boiling an onion or Swiss chard for the babies lunch. I can’t think of any pediatrician that recommends ricotta or Parmesan cheese for a six month old. But we tried it, and she loves it. No gas or tummy aches from the onion. The pureed meat is just fine.
And it all proves that everything – even what we feed our kids – is completely influenced by what everyone around us does.
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08.22.08
Posted in family, kids
at 10:25 am
For the first time since moving to Italy, we needed to head to the American Embassy. Americans who have kids abroad need to go there to register their child’s birth and get a fancy “Report of Birth Abroad” form.
We checked in right on time for the appointment, and gave the helpful clerk all of the forms we needed. She had us sit down and wait until the vice-consulate called us. Not long after, he called us to his window. He said he had no problem approving our application for our newborn’s citizenship. He signed a paper, looked at us, and said, “Now she’s an American citizen.”
And I got a little misty eyed. I was a little amazed that this man could grant (and I suppose deny) citizenship with the stroke of a pen. And I was also proud that my daughter was officially part of the country that I am proud to be a part of. Living in Italy has given me a new perspective on my home country, and perhaps the voices around me have emphasized some of its flaws. But I’m still 100% American.
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07.17.08
Posted in Ancona, church, family, friends, photography, Uncategorized
at 4:34 am
We have a group of 15 university students from College Heights Christian Church here in Ancona right now. They’ve been a great group, really ready to dive in and experience the culture and learn about our church.
On Monday, they hosted a day at the beach. They invited people they had met and we also invited the church to come and enjoy hamburgers and hot dogs on the grill (something that few of them had ever experienced).
It rained off and on all day, and after weeks of hot, humid weather, it was cool and windy. Just about dinner time, some church members showed up, and we got the grill going.
That’s when the storm clouds rolled in. The owner of the beach let us use his outdoor seating, which had a roof. We started seeing lightning hitting the ocean near us. And then, all of the sudden, it hailed on us. Ice was bouncing off the roof and into the area where we were seated. We quickly moved the food out of the rain, and took shelter under an awning. One of our church members said he had never seen hail before! And about 10 minutes later, it all stopped. We shook our head and laughed at the horrible weather for beach day.
And then we noticed the rainbow:
I’ve never seen a rainbow so large before! It was a full semi-circle that went into the sea on one side, and up and over the city of Ancona. I tried to stitch two pictures together above to give you an idea of how big it was.
God has the best endings.
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07.12.08
Posted in Ancona, culture, family
at 10:19 am
We’re in the middle of an apartment search. Unfortunately, our landlord needs her apartment back and has given us six months to get out. It’s not the best timing, but we’re doing our best to stay positive about things.
A realtor called me back today. I had called to inquire about an apartment, and she had a few others that might work. She described several which sounded good, and she said she would contact the landlords for me to set up the appointments.
An hour or so later she called. One of the landlords was nervous renting to a foreigner, and wanted to know what I did for a living and would only make an appointment if I could show proof of income. Neither of these things is illegal, unless she only requires these things from foreigners.
Neither the landlord nor the realtor has ever seen me. My accent on the phone was enough to tip them off. Unfortunately, I’ve seen countless examples of racism here. I’ve been in many a conversation where the subject of “those darn stranieri” gets brought up. I usually listen and then point out that I, too, am a straniero. At which point they quickly point out that I’m not the kind of straniero they’re talking about. They mean those stranieri that don’t have the same color skin as they do.
I know my little confrontration with racism was just that – very minor. And I imagine the landlord will apologize all over himself when they realize that they asked the “good kind of foreigner” for proof of income. But I can see where a bunch of seemingly little examples like this could build up over time and cause a whole lot of tension.
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07.08.08
Posted in Ancona, family
at 10:17 am
Today we were pleasantly suprised to get a note in the mail from the mayor of Ancona, Fabio Sturani. I’m pretty sure that’s his actual signature. “Benevenuto al nuovo cittadino” – Welcome to the new citizen.
I know … you’re probably jealous.
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06.12.08
Posted in family, kids
at 1:57 pm
June 9, 2008, 22:10.
4.240 kg. 53 cm.
Named after my dad, David Francis.
Wish he could be here to see the pictures.
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05.01.08
Posted in family, ministry
at 3:34 am
Yesterday I had the privilege of performing my first funeral service. A family of english-speakers needed someone to do a funeral in their own language, and a friend of a friend called Marcus and got the ball rolling.
I was (surprisingly) not nervous for the service. I surprised even myself at the confidence God helped me show even though I wasn’t 100% sure of what I was doing. And I was amazed at how many of the same things I was feeling that I felt at my dad’s funeral. It was comforting to me to take care of a hurting family, and to ask (and help them answer) the hard questions. Standing before their large family at the service, I saw their son losing the battle to hold back the tears and was reminded of my own battle at my dad’s service.
But somehow God has wired me to get through it. I found relief in my own sadness (which is often just below the surface even today) by guiding others through grief. The pastor in me soars in situations like this, and it makes me shake my head in wonder at the powerful God we serve who makes the impossible possible.
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04.16.08
Posted in Ancona, culture, family, kids
at 11:41 am
I ran across a surprising statistic the other day. We’ve long known that our family size of five made us more than a little unusual here in Ancona. Now we have a handy graphic to prove it, published by the city of Ancona. So in a couple of months when the new baby is born, we’ll join the other 420 families with more than five people present in the home. Only 420 in a city of over 100,000! At our kids’ schools, the majority of people have one, two kids at the most. The national average is 1.2 kids per family.
But it’s not just statistics that show how children are viewed by some here. I had a conversation the other day with a woman a bit older than me. She was married with one kid and marveled at how young I am and how many kids we have (we get that a lot). And then she said to me that if she had it to do all over again, she wouldn’t have had any children. She told me her son tries her patience, and “if she knew then what she knows now…”
I was kind of shocked. Granted, there have been days when the kids are grating on my nerves. But to wish that they had never been born?!
I’m trying to figure out where this comes from. Some of it, at least in people I have talked with that “regret” having kids, is just plain selfishness. Some of it comes from an inability to provide every single thing the child could ever want, especially as the family grows. But other than those two things, I’m stumped. I love my kids! I have learned so much about myself, and they bless my socks off! It breaks my heart to hear people (one time, in front of their child) lament ever having kids.
Don’t you see that children are God‘s best gift?
the fruit of the womb his generous legacy?
– Psalm 127:3 (MSG)
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04.03.08
Posted in family
at 5:47 am
My step mom recently sent us a batch of photos that she found. It was fun, and maybe a little bittersweet to see pictures of me and my dad when I was just a baby. But the question is this: does everyone have a laser beam background in some school photo?
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