05.02.10
Life without Grandparents
One thing I have been struck by lately is how involved Italian grandparents are in their grandkids’ lives. Italians seem to have much less of a desire to leave home to find jobs or an education, and so extended families living nearby is more common. In many Italian homes, the husband and wife both have to work to make ends meet. And so the kids head to grandma and grandpa’s house after school. There is a lot of gray hair as I wait to pick up the kids after school or as I drop the kids off at soccer or swimming.
But it’s more than just free babysitting. Italian kids seem to enjoy a closer relationship with their grandparents. And it’s made me realize how little contact my kids have with theirs. It really does make life harder. I know my kids miss out on that special bond with grandma and grandpa (and it’s our fault – we’re the ones who moved here). They miss getting to know adults who are less busy and have more time to focus on kid-stuff. Heidi and I miss having someone who can watch the kids for date nights (which hardly ever happen when the going rate for babysitters is $15/hour). I think even our church misses out on the wisdom that grandparents bring. The internet does allow a bit more of a connection than would normally be possible via letters and phone calls. But the distance is still there and still changes things.
And I have yet to find a way to fill that gap.